We are going to China?!

We are going to China?!

China

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Colourful is a 4 letter word.

Colourful is a 4 letter word.
"All of us have the devine spark within us and we so desperately need the breath of God to bring us to life and light. Jesus wants to set the church on fire so the world can warm themselves around us and find light and safety. We are here on earth to be a home and a refuge for the lost and broken. But first we must learn the art of togetherness and celebration. To welcome people into the party of true freedom of finding Jesus we must first be students of that very way of life. We need to learn to celebrate. We need to choose His joy." "You are beautiful in all of Your ways.You are colorful in the way that You save me...In the way that You give me life." The Spirit of God has made me; the breath of the Almighty gives me life. (Job 33:4 NIV) "Take a moment to remember who God is and who I am.There You go lifting my load again. No longer am I held by the yoke of this world.Come upon you the yoke of Jesus.His yoke is easy and His burden is so light! Your love carries me out of valleys and the darkest places." - Will Reagan & United Pursuit According to a random website, with 26 letters in the English alphabet, there are 456,976 different 4 letter word combinations. 1 of my favourite 4 letter words is yoke. Jesus says in Matthew 11, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you. Let Me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. (Matthew 11:28, 29 NLT) Jesus is sooOo0 colourful. Over the last few weeks Jesus renewed, refreshed, revived and healed parts of my heart. Thank You Jesus that I am in a constant state of brokenness so that I will aaaAlways need You more.  I looooOve that Jesus displays His creativity in and through us. Duh! He created US :) We are chosen Sons and Daughters. God wrote our stories with His divine breath..   It's so beautiful when YOU allow Jesus to teach you and mold you. In Scripture one of the people visiting Job says: "I am the same as you in God’s sight; I too am a piece of clay," (Job 33:6 NIV) and in Isaiah we read: "Yet You, Lord, are our Father. We are the clay, You are the Potter; we are all the work of Your hand." (Isaiah 64:8 NIV) I see Jesus colouring my story for me this year. He is bringing in splendid and awe-struck colour where there has only been grey-ness for such a long time. He will do it ALL when we continue to say YES!  God's faithfullness, is always MORE,It is beyond our understanding. It is for us and it is colourful.   "You went out to rescue Your chosen people, to save Your anointed ones." (Habbakuk 3) God is telling the ultimate story, and we part of it. (i didn't forget about love, which is another 4 letter word.. Just in case you wondered) :)
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A glimpse into your eyes

Today I am halfway through the journey of a lifetime, an adventure with You, Lord, Creator, Lover, Father, Friend. I remember how You captivated my heart by calling me to an adventure. You invited me "come with Me" and promised that it will be wild, great and full of You. Thinking back on the past four months it was already all of that and more... Reality struck me for a moment, as I perceived the beauty around me, the palm trees, the Caribbean ocean, the small islands so close that I can see the white beaches and hear the drumbeat of the reggae music.  With a big fat question mark on my face at the realization of where I'm at, I stand awestruck by the  mysterious way that You pursued me out of the hands of the enemy. And at Your perfect master plan to make me fall completely in love with You. Lord, I don't want to forget, please don't let me forget how Your loving arms wrapped around this broken girl for the first time. God remind me of every whisper and make me aware of that feeling over and over again. You are faithful, God and You are real.You called me into a plan, perfectly laid out in the palm of Your hands. And what motivates me to follow You wherever You lead are the puzzle pieces that You release bit by bit into my life. Those are the only parts I can hold on to, Lord, because whatever I lay my feet upon will crumble beneath me, but You are the cornerstone which my feet  are steadfast on. I will pursue You my King, I will dig deeper. What You reveal to me will be my only fortes and shelter. I'm nothing God.. But to You I am someone. Your the only one who could take this hater and turn her into a lover, who could recreate this destroyer into a reconciler. Once I was a manipulator, now I am an encourager. You took my heart of stone and gave me a heart of flesh... Once I was a slave, but now I'm a Son. I once was a PROSTITUTE but now I am a BRIDE. Yes, You manifested the most beautiful love story in me, Lord. I found my refuge in everything but You, giving my heart away several times, even though its purpose was to ever be in your perfect hands. You were always waiting for me, always turning back to me, always LOVING me. You are the greatest Love story ever written, Jesus Christ. You will forever be on my lips...
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Brokenness

Brokenness
"You opened up my ribs and played your melody, when my brokenness was all I saw in front of me..."   So, I broke my arm. In Colombia. Playing soccer. Can someone say Waka Waka? Since that first night in casualties I've been comforted by God's promise that it is part of His plan, that He wants to use my casualty for a greater Kingdom reality. Having never broken any bone in my body despite some perilous adventures and other silly games on roofs, you have to be convinced of God's hand when this happens on my journey of faith, in Colombia of all places. And so there I was, trusting God for healing my arm overnight (can you imagine the testimony and open doors?!) and then being disappointed. And so I had to ask myself, what is God doing?! The past few weeks I've been confronted with one great truth: Until you know how lost you are you do not know that you need a Saviour. (Thank you Wayne!). Having known Jesus for a long time and being raised by Christian parents with biblical principles, the story of my salvation was less about realising the darkness inside of me but more about seeking the light that is God. As Jansie put it: the miracle is that He saved me even when I thought I was ok! And so I've been asking myself, do I realise the depth of my sinful nature, how lost I was without Christ? Can I begin to fathom my brokenness, worthlessness without God? Hard questions, that I think should be asked by everyone. Since the beginning of training I've been broken and confronted by sin in many ways; mostly because I started to really read the Bible and because of the environment I found myself in. The reality is the more you get to know God and comprehend more of His Holiness, the more you are confronted by things in your life that falls short of His glory. I've been convicted about the things I've been exposing myself to, books and tv shows, my illegal music, sensitivity, pride and selfish ambition to name a few. My broken-arm journey has in a sense been a real personal one, dying to self and being stripped of pride. Learning what it means to be dependant, journeying on team: love and family. The broken arm became a symbol of my brokenness. And it hasn't always been easy, facing some harsh realities.  The harsh reality that as a Kingdom child I cannot be as independent as I have become accustomed to. The reality that I cannot be good enough out of myself. The reality that I am prideful. The reality that I am a sinner. The reality that I need God. Jesus asks us to be broken, to acknowledge the frailty of our humanity and the inability to please Him out of our flesh. But in the same breath He reminds us that He was broken on the cross so that we can be healed. When we come to Him in our brokenness we are comforted by the cross. ... But he was pierced for our rebellion, crushed for our sins. He was beaten so we could be whole. He was whipped so we could be healed. (Isaiah 53:5 NLT)  And so, back to my arm. Did I see the miracle that I was expecting? No. Did I see the arm used for a greater Kingdom reality? Definitely. There were some jokes going around about the screws in my arm and the parallel to Jesus. Thanks to the interesting Colombian orthopaedic methods I have two scars on my wrist. Two scars on my arm to remind me that Jesus was nailed to the cross. That my old man died with Him. That I am sinful and useless. But with that the promise: that acknowledging my depravity and incapability is exactly where He wants me to be! His power is made perfect in my weakness!  But he said to me,  "My grace is sufficient for you, for  my power is made perfect in weakness."  Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that  the power of Christ may rest upon me. (2 Corinthians 12:9 ESV) And so, as I learn to use my weak arm again I am also learning what it means to rest in grace. To be whole (and holy) in Christ. To just be myself and let God do it.    Watch out world! *Shout out to all the Colombians and gringos that helped, supported, advised, assisted, accompanied and loved me during this time. I am so grateful that words cannot even explain it. 
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