This whole Global Challenge has been tough. I've really been struggling to fit into my team and to find my purpose. I spoke to my leader and she said a few things that was needed, but I want to tell you about two things. Fitst she said that you're value is not in your purpose, it is in who you are. Second thing is that we are not human doings, we are human beings. I am not going to elaborate on that, but think about it.
"During the night, Paul had a vision of a man of Macedonia standing and pleading with him, "Come over to Macedonia and help us."
Wait! What? This is not about me?
After a whirlwind 7 weeks of training, that felt somehow longer than that considering all encompassed in them. I had laughed, cried, been excited, angry, confused, exhausted refreshed, very uncomfortable and so much more. But you see, I'd chosen this ( at least I think so) and when I came to Jeffrey's Bay, South Africa I knew training would be challenging but quite necessary. Well, I didn't foresee my irritation at having to do some athletic exercises on Survivor, being challenged on how I prefer to put God in a box I can wrap my head around when in actual fact he is way beyond that, the value of integrity always, even in seemingly small things. Anxiety about kiddies ministry and dealing with teens and the unexpected excitement over the response of one introvert child and being ok with the teenagers unresponsiveness at times. The joys of working together, challenges of language barriers, hiccups of planning meals, unpredictable nature of working on building sites, greater awareness of the spiritual, facing beliefs about myself and others with regards to the prophetic. The ever increasing appreciation of people in their diversity, forming and building relationships and the beauty and wonder over and over of the liberating effect of God's love and grace ... I didn't think I was 100% ready but I had the best preparation program from dedicated men and women who depended on God.