Don't stop living

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You must leave everything behind, sacrifice all you have to start something new, and move some boundaries in yourself. 

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no boundaries

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I used to see walls enclosed around me, but now I am living with no boundaries. I am like an unbridled horse- FREE to run the distance. I can’t even see the end of the field- just the sun on my back and wildflowers under my feet. The farther I run the less afraid I become. I have stepped into FREE COUNTRY, where the territory never ends because it was created and is governed by the True King. The walls around me I had made myself- their names were doubt, shame, fear, and useless. My walls were torn down and as I stood in the middle of what used to be my loneliness, I was now surrounded by beauty. The sun warmed my body and the fresh air filled my lungs. I started to run. The ground below me was soft; bright colored flowers were its clothing. As I ran, shackles broke off from my hands and feet. My heart felt FULL as it beat faster and faster in my chest. I ran fast and far, but never lost my breath. The air inside of me was different. Fullness wrapped around me like a coat, I looked down and NEW clothes covered me- lovely and white. I was fearful that I would ruin my new clothing and make them dirty, but nothing could destroy these garments. They were made of strength, dignity, and praise. I felt home in an open field. I didn’t need the walls that I once built for protection and out of fear. I was not scared to be seen or hurt this time. The warmth of the sun, the freshest air, and the softest ground sang LIFE back into me. As I walked, I saw His face- so beautiful, so glorious that it hurt! I stopped in my tracks. I almost wanted to look away or run and hide. But then His eyes met mine. His smile took my shame away in an instant. He was the Creator- the One who broke down my walls, the One who filled my heart overflowing. All of the beauty around me paled in comparison to ONE SINGLE GLANCE from Him. He is my Creator. He is the One brought me here and loved the shackles off my feet. He sang truth and freedom into my dried up bones. I am home here with Him.

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I am a tree

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I am a tree. Yes, complete with leafs of different shapes and sizes, roots gripping to whatever I find my security in and fruit of different colours and tastes. The soil my roots are resting in determines how my leaves look and my fruit taste. I go through different seasons and I usually look a lot different after every cycle of spring through to winter. Sometimes a thorn would stick its head out or a wilted fruit pops up and I would try to get rid of it as hard as I can, showcasing more good fruit next to the bad one or hiding the thrown with my leafs, but the problem laid in the worldly soil caressing my roots.

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Identity in Jesus

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When I arrived on the 10th of January in Jeffreys Bay to start our training for "Global challenge expeditions" , it was mostly the first and the last word of the name that got me excited. Little did I know how much God is going to "Challenge" me to grow in a closer relationship with Him and become more like Him.Louw often says we need to look for opportunities to serve (and there are many times that these opportunities present themselves). I saw myself as someone that enjoys to help and serve people. And it is true to the extent where I can get something out of it. Because I saw myself as someone that helps others, I found my identity in pleasing other people. It is not a bad thing to help others, but my motivation was in the wrong place. In the beginning of this week we did a Luke 10 journey. We were sent out in groups of 3, like Jesus sent out the 70 in pairs of 2. We were not allowed to take any food or extra clothes. We had to fully trust God to provide all our needs while we share His love with the people around us. On the last day of this amazing time of seeing God's providence, I was physically, emotionally and spiritually exhausted. Our host asked us if we would like to go and help a widow of 85 to work in her garden. We were excited to also be able to serve someone in doing some physical work. I was amazed at how alive this old lady is and just how much love radiated from her. She goes to the old age home a few times every week to lead bible studies and share Jesus's love with these old people that are useless in the eyes of the world. Something that struck me, was how certain she is in who is. It reminded me of PHILIPPIANS 2. Jesus knows who He is and that is why He was able to leave heaven and come to earth and die on a cross for our sin. He knew who He was in John 13 where it enabled Him to take the role of a servant and wash his disciples' feet. He knew who He was when Satan came to tempt Him and that prevented him from falling into temptation. I am starting to realise who I am in Christ Jesus.GALATIANS 2:20I have been crucified with Christ [that is, in Him I have shared His crucifixion]; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body I live by faith [by adhering to, relying on, and completely trusting] in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. It is only from the place of knowing who I am in Him, that I can serve others without expecting something in return. It is still a challenge, but the challenge isn't to strive to serve more and love more to be seen by others or even becoming a better person. It is about knowing that what Hebrews 10:10 says is true. "And in accordance with this will (of God), we have been made holy through the offering made once for all of the body of Jesus Christ".

 

When I start to understand that I stand clean before God because of what Jesus did, I don't have to find my identity in other people anymore. Todd White said: "People can't take away something that they never gave to you." God gave me my identity and I can love and serve from this place. 
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A new beginning!

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Hello, Welcome to my blog! I'm not sure what I'm doing here yet, but im doing it. This blogging thing is new to me. I want to keep the theme of my blogs about experiences even if it's more personal, but it would be better if you could learn something out of it.

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Are you listening?

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I've been away from home for more than a month now and I find myself thinking again can I hear God, will I ever hear Him or am I even listening... ? So now I'm looking back at these few weeks and everything that happened and if I've actually been listening, By that I don't just mean listening to a sermon or a teaching but also the experiences God have put me in and the challenges I've faced.  Although there is probably a lot of experiences filled with Jesus in these few days, there is one that I just can't shake.

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The Journey Lies Ahead

The journey lies ahead

Many people believe that the earth is flat, the rest think it's round. Does it really matter? Because ultimately there will always be the hills on the road, mountains with snow hats, valleys with lush forests, oceans with roaring waves, rivers with tons of water which you will encounter and to conquer, cross, climb or swim, requires more than just a strong mind or body, It requires faith and the ability to have no fear. 

These first few weeks have been a journey of faith. On this journey God will test your faith, leave you with nothing, but give you everything at the same time (Luke 10 journey) He will create character in you and He will restore your identity by challenging your faith in Him. 

He has found me in a desert land and in the waste howling wilderness He led me about. He instructed me and kept me as the apple of His eye. He has searched for a remnant that is willing to walk this journey to listen and obey, to lay down your life out of love for Him. His sons and daughters don't believe in Him so that they can go to heaven. We don't read the bible or pray because we know that's the right thing to do. We walk with Him because we love Him. 

His spirit will beautify you and prepare you, cleanse and sanctify you. The  journey lies ahead. 

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Breaking Barriers

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Life is a collection of moments. My collection has grown considerably within the last month. Some moments were definitely easier than others physically, emotionally and mentally.

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Adios to comfort barriers

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"A ship in a harbour is safe, but that is not what a ship was designed for" To be at home safe, guarded and chilled-back seems like the life but what what kind of life is it when you do not go beyond the walls of safety and have an adventure? These past few weeks God came to shift my comfort walls to a point where I was faced with situations that I was ready to give up on everything I ever believed was true. I was faced with a lot of "why do you want me here Lord" and everytime I just felt His heart saying... so I can be glorified through your life and actions. So far our training has been a real challenge but a good one. Every challenge (whether it be mental, spiritual, physical, emotional) God always came and show His love and provision and the "why" was always answered (not fully but every puzzle piece made sense) At one stage God really surprised me by showing me that I can go beyond what I thought was my limit. I am not a very sporty person and a lot of the challenges we had to encounter was hill up or hill down. Running between challenges, tired and out of breath my team mate encouraged me up the hill and before I knew it I was running up! I think both myself and my team mate had to take a moment to come over the adrinaline shock. That's when I realized the importance of having a team. Inside your comfort you don't always see the value of the people around you. When you experience an earthquack and your comfort walls are down and you are vulnerable that's where I learned the value of having a team who not only support me but we can have each others backs as we are faced with the same challenges. "A ship in a harbour is safe, but that is not what a ship was designed for"... I am ready this year be be the ship that God sends to sail beyond the harbour's safety and be a light to every tribe, nation and tongue.

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Rooted

lily

 

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